Random Shorts I would have posted on Twitter…

As I mentioned, I’m miffed at Twitter with its determination to control all things timeline, so I’m making a short compilation of things I might have posted there on the spur-of-the-moment:

  • News headling: Eyeball Licking Trend Giving Pinkeye to Japanese Kids. Er…did we really need to be told licking someone’s eyeball was a bad idea?

  • Everyone seems to be putting videos of themselves talking about nothing on YouTube, or worse, showing us video of them playing video games. What the heck is with that…and who is watching all these sorry videos? I mean, I understand the “covers” of music, even if bad, I understand why people would post them. But talking at a webcam in their bedrooms as if they are news commentators or variety show hosts? Giggling while playing video games? No one cares, so stop making these silly things.

  • Dear Johnny Depp: Are there any more of my youthful memories you can make a travesty of? Or have you run out of them now?

  • To those of you asking me for shortcuts in how to tell if a specific Old-Time Radio show is still under copyright or trademark protection – there ain’t one. Contact a lawyer who specializes in United States “intellectual property” (that a recent creation and not anything real, since something non-tangible cannot be “property”) law and pay them to do the research. Anything else, including listening to my opinion, is just plain wrong.

  • Received spam from “IMF OFFICE” – is it wrong of me to immediately think, “Impossible Missions Force?”

  • Speaking of spam, when the subject calls me, “dear,” pretty sure it’s going to get trashed unopened.

  • “John” (with an Indian accent) called me telling me my computers were affecting their servers. This is, of course, a well-known scam, where I am supposed to open up security holes in my computer so the b*stards can take it over and use it as part of a botnet, or charge me hundreds of dollars to fix a non-existant problem. I…um…declined, and finally got to use every four-letter-word in my arsenal against a human instead of the robocalls I generally get. Rather satisfying, actually.

    Guessing “John” won’t be calling me again any time soon.

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