Nostalgic Rumblings
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5/14/2012


Thoughts on email spam…

Filed under: General — Charlie Summers @ 7:10 pm

Just some random thoughts about the spam I deal with every day:

If it says, “Legitimate Loan Offer,” it ain’t.

I trash unopened anything that comes in in a language I do not speak. Might sound politically-incorrect, but it sure saves a lot of time.

Ok, one that cracked me up was the spam from “BBC English” that was in Spanish.

No one is going to offer anyone a job out-of-the-blue via email. No, seriously.

“Scam Compensation Alert” means this email, not older ones.

Actually got spam email from “Captain James T. Kirk,” supposedly an American captain in Afghanistan. How stupid are these spammers?

If the subject of an email is “Hello” I say goodbye.

Political spam is really annoying. The odds of you coming anywhere near what I believe is negligible, and the odds you’ll tick me off are really high. When you’re running for office in a state I don’t even live in and send me spam, you are just pathetic.

Although one political spam made me laugh; it complained that bad politicians, “pander to the views of their voters.” But…um…isn’t that the job of an elected representative?

No, you can’t trust me with your fortune of $21-million. I won’t give it to the poor, I’ll just party it all away.

Look, knuckleheads…Robert Mueller, III is not going to be emailing me for anything, be it an arrest threat or to pick up the millions left to me in some Nigerian bank account - he has flunkies for that, and is far too busy sucking up to Congress and his boss at the White House to waste time emailing me. And while we’re on the subject, try not to put the entire threat letter in the Subject: header field…makes you look even more foolish than you do already.

Feel free to post your own thoughts about spam in the comments section.

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